Shidduchim means match-making. Although marriages are divinely inspired, we must do our share, scientifically, with perseverance, logic and constant learning. Somebody said that to work in the community for a spiritual cause one must not tire, not anger, and not hasten to finish before it is proper. So frustrating is the search for Shidduchim, so much personal pain and affront is involved, that we often tire. This is wrong. Can we afford to tire?
There is the mother who said, "My daughter is not garbage." She stopped looking, and her daughter missed the boat. There is another mother who just kept going right into the wave of shame, and she made a wonderful choice for her daughter.
When your child, or you, come of age and enter the mating market, ask around. The Jewish people have been helping others marry since Isaac found a wife for his father, Abraham, when Sarah died. G-d matched Adam and Eve, and, as we explain in our online book on Jewish Gender, Marriage and Sexuality, G-d did all of the things a good matchmaker does. He prepared Adam and he prepared Eve before they met.
In the secular world, marriage is in big trouble, as men refuse to tie the knot, and women pursue careers until they come dangerously close to the 35 year fertility cutoff. Read our commentary in Woe to Women: Ruined Men
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